BOYFRIEND ADVICE.. GUYS AND GIRLS.?

I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now. I met him when I was 17 and he was 21 through a friend. Within the first 2 years of our relationship he lived 45 minutes away from me and I'd only see him on the weekends. We never fought EVER. Finally he moved out of his parents house. (his dad still pays for him to live and he doesnt have a job, meaning: i don't pay anything either) I moved in with him for a year then moved out for 6 months because we didn't get along. We would get in fights all the time. I moved back in expecting things to get better but they have only got worse. Here are some abnormal things we do. Why would we both put up with this type of behavior?





1) We spend every minute together. Such as: When we work, we are on the phone with the other person. When we go to class, the other person is listening from inside their pocket. weird right?


2) When we get into a fight we call up our families and complain about eachother. Within an hour everything is back to 'normal' but our families are still upset.


3) We say hurtful things to eachother when we fight. He said to me that he wishes I would die. It's shocking i know, it was to me too. Plus, We call eachother names.


4) There is NO... absolutely NO trust.


5) We stay together even though we make eachothers lives hell.





We control eachothers lives and we take advantage of it. I know that he likes to smoke 2 or 3 cigs a day. If he makes me upset I take them and hide them and a fight starts because of that. I like to go tan but he doesnt like to wait the 20 minutes so he won't go with me if he's upset.





I need some advice PLEASE!





*Is there a way to get trust back in a relationship?





Any way to save this longterm relationship or am I wasting my time?





*Would you ever tolerate a girl/guy wanting to be such a large part of your life?BOYFRIEND ADVICE.. GUYS AND GIRLS.?
The only way to save a relationship is to become understanding to partner's wants and needs. Plus, if you feel that you still love him and he still loves you -try to understand him first and give him the chance to express what he really feels for you. If you feel that there is no way of making the relationship work, you can then decide to let yourselves enjoy the freedom of being single again.BOYFRIEND ADVICE.. GUYS AND GIRLS.?
OK, I dont know if I would tolerate this, but they say that the best couples fight every so often, but it sounds like you guys fight a lot.


To get back the trust, maybe take a break from it. Take some time off from each other and if it turns out that one of you doesnt wanna get back with the other than thats the way it should be. But taking time off would give each of you time to do whatever and blow off steam and when you get back together, it will be like a fresh start. hope this helps.








answer mine:





http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Aj73sh9mv0XeGMI.P2C_wWgazKIX;_ylv=3?qid=20091011201838AAdmjBo
Space is necessary. You both have maturing to do, and you should consider taking a little break. That does not sound healthy. It sounds like something I went through, and trust me....people NEVER CHANGE unless they want themselves to. You can't do much to make a person be something they're not...it's instilled in their minds to be that way. You can always try, there's always hope, don't give up completely.
I think he's a little too old for you, and its normal that you feel so attached to him because youve been together for do long.





I think you guys shouldn't do too much stuff together for like a week to see how that feels.





if you really love him stay if not pause the relationship





and tell him stop being a ***** and stop smoking cigs. he should roll 1 up instead ;)